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So I had drill this weekend. It really wasn't bad, other than the fact that I was almost late both days, and ULTRA tired the entire weekend. But I am entirely to blame, and all I can really think is how fortunate I am that I didn't miss first formation.

We inventoried EVERY piece of equipment in my unit. It was a long weekend, and occasionally frustrating. Overall though, I enjoyed myself. I'm getting closer with the other soldiers in my unit, and I have come to like most of them. Things are still a little awkward with the guy at my unit. I just feel weird around him. I tried avoiding him, but I know that only made me come off as rude. I am not interested in him AT ALL. Ihave told him this several times. It's just that every time he is around me I feel all gross and disgusted. I think about the things he has said to me and it is next to impossible for me to forget about it. I feel like I am doing a really good job, but I know it isn't good enough. I will never be able to trust him again, and I will never feel completely safe and/or comfortable around him. In the back of my mind, I will always be thinking about how sick he is. In the crevices of my ears I will continue to hear his disgusting words...and in the eyes of my mind....I don't even want to go there. I think I should end this by saying I really, really, REALLY don't like this situation.

On a different note, I have developed an extremely bad habit of speeding. I don't mean speeding as in a few over the limit, I mean speeding as in 100+ mph. Considering both my rear tires are bald and little pieces appear to be missing from the inner sides of the tires....I truly do scare myself a little when I drive that fast. Even though it is nerve-racking because I don't want to wreck, stressful because I don't want to be late, and risky because I would hate to get a speeding ticket; part of me definitely gets a little rush when I drive that fast. It's nice to know some rules do not apply.

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if you feel that strongly about him maybe you should report him...

I did total that car on a ramp on the freeway in rainy weather going WAY too fast. Hopefully the lesson is learned here. I try reallllly hard to slow down when I drive.....lets hope there are no more maaajor accidents.

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